Dating Tips

Why Is Infidelity so Common Nowadays?

The law of attraction is somewhat funny. One minute you are doing great as a single person but feeling a notch lonely, and then this person crosses your path and sweeps you off your feet. Suddenly, you cannot concentrate on any given task without checking whether this charmer has texted you. Although you have seen many beautiful people before, this crush’s face is all you can see even in your dreams, and before you know it, you are hopelessly in love. For the first couple of months in dating, you tend to view your partner as a walking god with no flaws whatsoever.

But then, after a while, you start to realize that there is more where this prince charming or wonder woman came from. You start to notice that there are other women with better round derrieres out there. You start to realize some dudes have better abs than your guy. The small voice in your mind starts to convince you that cheating is good as long as you are not going overboard with it. Once you taste the forbidden fruit, it’s hard to stop. But why do people cheat on their spouses?

women pose at a parade

When Is It Okay to Cheat on Your Spouse?

Although we grow up being taught that cheating is morally wrong and a sin in the religious context, one cannot help but wonder why is infidelity in a relationship so common? Hardly a week goes by before a relationship gone sour hits the news headlines, with some couples going overboard and seriously harming or killing each other. It’s hard to believe that someone who was this perfect angel to you a while back could now be straying to someone else’s bed, and most people are not able to confront the news of their spouse cheating too well. The feeling of betrayal mixed with anger can be explosive.

Some people seem to be naturally born as promiscuous as the famous King Solomon in the bible. The guy is said to have had a whopping seven hundred wives, but his libido was too active that he needed an extra three hundred concubines on the side. There are many such people in the world today who believe that cheating is good and even healthy in a relationship. Such a person will argue that just like you cannot feed on carbohydrates all the time without craving some vitamins and proteins here and there, it’s also necessary to sleep with other people rather than your spouse to sort of enjoy a balanced diet.

One can argue that there are two types of cheaters. The first type demonstrated above is the serial cheat who practices cheating knowingly like a hobby. Such a person will never be faithful even if you give him Miss Universe, Rihanna, and Adriana Lima to be his wives. The second category is the person who succumbs to the temptation of cheating based on circumstance or environment. In such a scenario, this person may be going through a rough patch with their spouse where there is not much of a sex life going, and they will be tempted to jump on the next stick or cookie that comes their way.

Then begs the question, when is it okay to cheat on your spouse? This query may have very different answers depending on who you ask. For instance, if you were to approach your religious leader with such a question, the answer would be a capital - NEVER, and you would probably have to kneel down and get exorcised for even considering it. But pose the same to your group of friends, and they might advise you to cheat at the slight sign of neglect from your spouse.

There are indeed many reasons for cheating, and the funny thing is that every cheat feels that they were justified to do so. Although some people may act so remorseful once they have been caught in the act and try to insinuate how the temptation was too strong and they were too weak to resist, the fact of the matter is that every sane human being has a choice when deciding to strip naked and lock body parts with someone other than their spouse. Whether it’s okay or not to do so is similarly a personal decision.

Know Why Cheating on Your Spouse Is Wrong

People invest a lot of time, money, and effort to make a relationship work. Before you settle on one partner and start dating exclusively, there are usually many options to choose from people who are actively pursuing you and who seem genuinely interested in you. But just like you choose a lottery ticket, you decide to place your bet on one person and direct all your efforts to them. You even go the extra mile of changing some of your ways and cutting out some of your friends to please your spouse in a relationship. Dating also uses money because your partner needs to be pampered with special lunches in exotic places, trips to amazing destinations, gifts, and so on.

There is nothing as frustrating as going all in to please your spouse, only to discover that you share them with someone else. Knowing that you are not the exclusive beneficiary of that special blowjob she gives can make you jump in front of a speeding train or dangerously diminish your ego at best. Other cases are hard to comprehend, like when you find a woman cheating on her husband with another woman. Such an infidelity scenario can leave you utterly confused, wondering if you were dating a lesbian disguised in a straight girl’s clothing or whether your lady is bisexual. Some guys would, however, view this as a blessing to have them both.

When someone falls in love with you, they expose all their weaknesses and strengths to you. It’s like your spouse literally hands you a knife, and you can either decide to stab them in the back with it or just head to the kitchen and carve out mango for them. Your spouse places their emotional wellbeing in your hands, and it’s up to you to make them feel special and complete or tear their hearts into minute pieces that can never be sewn back together. They also trust you with their health because cheating can bring along fatal, incurable diseases.

Although some people try to put on a strong face when confronted with a cheating spouse, the truth is that infidelity causes too much damage to the affected spouse. In some cases, the hurt is too deep and irreparable such that one can never be able to trust a person again or fully enjoy a relationship. Betrayal starts to make you question your self-worth, whether it is that you are not good enough or beautiful like the person your spouse cheated with or what exactly is wrong with you.

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There could be a million and one causes of cheating in a relationship, but the aftermath is not all roses in most cases. Jealousy creeps in, which explains why we see some people stabbing or poisoning their cheating spouses. There is also a lot of mistrust, feeling betrayed, and eventually, hatred might creep in. The spouse who has been cheated on may develop low self-esteem and depression, and self-damaging behaviors like alcoholism. They might also feel the need for revenge and turn into serial cheats in the process.

Here Are Causes and Effects of Cheating in Relationships

Every single action that we undertake in this life has a consequence attached to it. If, for example, you decide to be that woman that is cheating on her husband with another woman, you might enjoy the thrill for a moment and get away with it, but sooner or later, all things that are done in darkness will come to light. The main reason why cheating on your spouse is definitely a bad idea and totally wrong is that you never realize what you have until it’s too late and you lose it. Wait until that partner you are cheating on leaves and you feel the void.

Some of the main causes of cheating in a relationship include:

Long distance from your spouse

This infidelity scenario happens all too often. You have a spouse that you love and adore so much, and your relationship is great, and then they are forced to travel far away either for school or work. Although sexting and phone sex might do it for the first few months, loneliness starts creeping in, and you find yourself craving some touch. Although you still love your spouse, you might find yourself falling into the trap of cheating.

Sexual frustration

Most people that stray from their relationships cite unhappiness as the main cause of cheating. You might have a spouse that is great in all other ways apart from the sack. It could be they have some underlying health problems that affect their performance in bed, or they seem to have a low appetite for sex compared to your ultra-high libido. You might be having a great relationship but find yourself looking for a side dish to satisfy your burning desires. You might also have a spouse that likes to punish you for every slight mistake you make by denying you sex, and you are tempted to look elsewhere.

Promiscuity

Some people were born to cheat. Even if you give them the best blowjobs, anal sex, doggy style, BDSM, pearl necklace, and every single erotic trick you can think of, they will still cheat. It is a dangerous incurable disease because no matter what effort you put in, the player will still cheat on you.

Once you start cheating on your spouse, things subconsciously start to change in your relationship even before you have been busted. Some of the effects of cheating include:

Guilt

Although it might have felt like fun when you were tapping that fat ass next door, guilt and regret start creeping in once you see your loving spouse. You start to wonder what led you to cheat on such a beautiful soul.

Heartbreak

Remember when you promised never to break your spouse’s heart. Once they find out that you cheated on them, their heart shatters to a million pieces, and the feeling of infidelity turns to cold rage. Many people tend to develop low self-esteem and sink into depression after being cheated on in a relationship.

Broken trust and relationships

woman singing and playing the guitar

Trust is the seal that holds relationships together. Once trust is broken, most relationships tend to gravitate towards their end. Even if your spouse decides to forgive you that seed of infidelity has already been planted, and they will always suspect that you are cheating in a relationship even when you are not.